有人说我该放弃，要反悔比执迷还容易。

after talking to ching yee yesterday, i felt that i had to like say this. nothing important lah, just that it seems damn stupid. the whole four tier differentiated learning in chinese is really just crap =.= like sure differentiated in terms of no of movies you watch and maybe the amount you get to copy. content wise, only slightly. and all that hype about bsp, about the importance of grooming billingual individuals to blah blah blah just seems really stupid. i mean like, bsp in nanyang really doesnt cover much. one hour a week. im quite sure if you go around asking bsp students in nanyang what they learnt, they would probably take a while to respond. and most of us probably can only say the topic, nothing much content wise. like all those whatever 运动 that we learnt about. i practically dont know anything about it. bsp in nanyang is totally not an accurate reflection of china studies in hwa chong. not even one of a millionth.

oh look! I feel so prepared for that! =.=

the thing about GEP

figured i'll put this here as well... since our time in nanyang is drawing to a close soon. and so is our time in GEP, as GEPers.

I think the whole problem about GEP in nanyang is that they kind of segregate us from the rest and label us GEP (although most secondary schools dont keep GEPers together) and yet we aren't doing anything different from the rest of the classes. Granted, there are instances that we might get priority in certain matters. But the point is that academic wise (which we're supposed to be good or better at) there's practically nothing done.

If we're supposed to be in a special program then at the very least there must be something different about us. Else, there's no point keeping us as one GEPer class anyway. its's juz like how the math and science class has a different math syllabus is sec 3 and how the hp classes have to take one more subject that the rest of us in sec 3. Not that i really wanted to be treated differently as a GEper, just that if they want to brand us in that way, they have to do something about it. And not just leave us with a name and let things be.

Of course like the rest of the GEPers, im quite sure we all enjoyed the supposed treatment we get and of course are proud to be called GEpers. But the flaw in this system is that they have put all of us into this mold since primary 4, since we were 10. Other GEPers not in nanyang have probably crawled out of that mold and gone on. But here in nanyang, this mold has just become more distinct and its like a hole that's got deeper and deeper. Having spent 7 years in a system whereby you have the privilege of a small class and being surrounded by practically the same people each year, we're going to find it very hard to adapt to life in JC where we all get thrown back into the 'normal way of school life'. Im sure we get along quite well with many people in the mainstream, but the thing is that we often dont interact with them on a academic basis. Granted that you study with them for eoys or anything, it doesnt change the fact that you have not been in the classroom environment with them for a whole 7 years, and that is something really different.

When the time comes in less than half a year for us to climb out of this deep hole, I believe most of us will struggle to get out of it. For it has already become our way of life, the circle that we are so used to and so comfortable with. But that is not the way society works and we'll be forced to get used to that fact. And here is the whole crux of the problem of GEP.

Whatever it is, I have to say that I really enjoyed all these and am really very glad to have been given a chance to experience all these. Ultimately, even though we might not have been given what we wished, we still have to thank the MOE for coming up with this, for giving us such an awesome chance to feel special, to experience these 7 years as a GEPer.

GEP FTW! 

It's been ages since i last posted and actually a whole lot of things happened. so i shall start from napfa?


it was quite interesting to have to do napfa during a retest. and i seriously suspect they are like a lot more lax cuz of that. ESPECIALLY in IPU. lol or maybe its just that ms sabrina wasn't the one assessing us, cuz she's damn strict bout that. anyway, the results.


IPU: 19
Sit ups: 40 something
Shuttle run: 11.2 or something (all thanks to some crazy netball girl who dashed out of nowhere!)
SBJ: 198! (really awesome cuz when i practiced my range was from 170 to 190 o.o)
Sit and reach: 58 (although i would have thought 60 was a much nicer number... xD)
2.4: too terrible to be disclosed


i suppose this year's napfa was quite good, with my sbj and sit and reach being the bst. shuttle run and 2.4 was just dreadful. cant believe how badly i did for 2.4. it's like about the same or worse than my result in sec 1, which was wow.


and then we had the flags performance for the flag presntation for YOG. amazingly, the audience included DPM teo chee hean and had ppl like teo ser luck as well. the entire performance was really fast. its like one moment we were waiting for the DPM to arrive and the next, we just zoomed on stage. although i suppose we were regarded as calefares, that doesnt really matter much. i hope. at the very leat we had to the chance to perform there and then regardless of how important it really was for the occasion.


then there was the block tests on thursday. i wrote the yao qing han and the zuo wen about zhong xue sheng li cai. i suppose it was okay? just that im not sure if i missed out any details about the yao qing han when i wrote it. and i originally intended to present my glog to cikgu during thursday recess, but thanks to the school only giving us 45 mins in between chinese papers and australian chem thing, and another 15 mins between that and la right after that, i ended up not having enough time... seriously, the school is damn stingy with recesses. like they didnt even bother to give us a slightly longer recess after block tests and instead decided to split up the one hour into 45 min and 15 min breaks. oh btw the australian chem thing was really easy. like there were questions which required absolutely no chemical knowledge and just common sense. lol and to quote herah after we took it: i wonder what they learn in school.


oh and there was the debate thing between 401 and 414 during assembly. btw, those were the only 2 sec 4 classes that participated and it ended up that all the sec 3 classes lost to them =.= anyway, i suppose the debate was quite close and i have to say that it got really confusing to the end. plus having en ting as a chair was really amusing.not gonna comment much about the debate, but i just had to say something about an example raised by i dunno who on soccer. someone said that the reason why we have to pay so much to watch epl now is cuz of the demand of the people in singapore or something. well, i would think the real reason is that singtel and starhub were bloody stupid in bidding for the world cup. in order to outbid each other, they ended up offering some astronomical sum to bid for the world cup. epl saw that and realised that these singapore companies have a damn lot of money and yet they're paying only this much for the rights to telecast the epl. obviously if you show off your riches, you attract thieves. that is exactly what happened to singtel and starhub. the epl would be stupid not to extort money from them. and that's why we end up having to pay so much lah. so all i can say about that is that it had absolutely nothing to do with the debate and should not have been used by anyone at all =.=


then on friday came the craziest thing. 3 presentations in a row. in three different languages. chinese sia presentation, then ih topical presentation, followed by glog presentation. and the thing about chinese sia was that zhi qi and i officially started on the sia we were presenting (we changed our title and the focus) last sunday. lol damn zai lah. we were rushng everything like crap, even till the last minute during pccg that i paid no attention to. luckily, we managed to pull it off and li wen juan seemed relatively pleased with us. hopefully, it wasn't that obvious that we were not the least bit prepared.


then came ih which was equally screwed cuz shi ting fell asleep before finishing her part on like thursday (friday morning actually). and audrey wasn't there. so we tried to go up to kuan and ask her if we could present on monday instead, but she said we would get zero if we didnt present on friday, so we just went up and ad libbed. despite us thinking that we were screwed, it turns out that we weren't according to kuan who said that we did quite well and were able to answer her questions. we couldnt really believe it, but well good for us i suppose.


and then it was the glog presentation during recess. surprisingly it was the presentation i was the most prepared for, even though it was in malay. i suppose its cuz i was already prepared to present it last monday and due to all sorts of things that happened it ended up being pushed back. but yeah it was good and so i survived friday.


malay blocks on monday. should be able to cope, i hope...

the taiwan ppl left today! it was quite sad on thursday cuz they left so fast, although the waving to them incessantly plus the threatening to get on the bus and leave with them was damn funny. they only come for like a few days and they're gone so fast it feels so... its juz like when we go to china for so long and only go to the school for like less than a week. that seriously needs to be changed.


anyway, on to wushu! i finally learnt almost the entire jiu changquan tao on tuesday! and of course we did qi... the school should seriously stop treating us as though we are wushu exponents and think that we wont face ANY problems if you juz pop in and tell us that 'oh, we need you to perform in like 2, 3 weeks. AND its the tao that you're the MOST familiar tao you know! like QI!'. and after we ALMOST finalised the tao, we were greeted with the awesome news that we would be performing in the audi, and so rejoice! =.= gosh. i guess that juz explained everything.


but still, i hope we can get everything right in time. its kind of hard cuz of napfa stuck in between and other stuff, but well it's not the first time we've had to do things like this. im sure practice makes perfect.

school has been better than i thought it would be simply because i expected to be screwed going into the school term with quite a bit of stuff undone. so far, the time to be screwed has been pushed back and uh serves as a great relief to someone who needs to dedicate her time to the tv screen, esp world cup. lol excuses, excuses.


training tmr! looking forward to learning as much of the jiu changquan tao as possible =D and btw, the way xue teaches is rather... interesting

时机不容错过，否则往事只能回味

我们都知道时光是短暂的。四年的时间，就这样一眨眼的过去了。上个星期的接班让我感触良多，也让我非常依依不舍。假期第一个礼拜回到学校时，因为无所事事（马来语在一个钟头后才开始）我就独自到武馆去。我一个人躺在了地毯的中央，想着想着，往事全都浮现在我脑海里。

中一的时候，我不知何故选择加入南中武术队。当时，我们还没有武馆，每个人都在四楼的个个角落练习。还记得我们看到的第一个测试，是在那么小的空间进行的。学姐们一个个上场，而我们则因为无知，可能是打气太过头了吧，结果还被学姐骂。每次训练的时候，总是会有一些中四的学姐（偶尔还有一些中三的）监督我们练南中拳。他们当时的严格要求令我们气愤，每一个人的动作都要完美无暇才能继续。我们总觉得自己被折磨得很惨，每次训练后总是腿软软的走回家。还记得有一段时间我们受不了她的视若无睹，对于另外一些学姐感到畏惧，又觉得有学姐几位幽默。不过如今我真的很感激他们当时对我们的苛刻、严格。那年年尾武馆终于修建完毕，我们从礼堂搬了两个重的无可比拟的地毯上了三楼。那中间的辛苦和汗水，我绝对忘不了。

中二的时候，我们第一次去比赛。对于从来没有比赛经验的我们，比赛是多么令我们畏惧的啊。更何况是要比单项，四段剑。在比赛的过程中，我并不知道自己在干什么，竟然有昏昏欲睡的感觉。虽然成绩不是很理想，不过那次比赛的经验对我来说还是非常难能可贵。我们在一起练了集体刀，八个人的集体刀。虽然当时我们希望只有七人参赛。比赛前不久，教练把我们的动作改了又改，换了又换，让中二的我们非常担心。担心自己会忘记套路，会无法与音乐配合，无法与队友配合。结果比赛当天真的出事了，而且我们错得那么明显。也不知道为什么，评判竟判给了我们铜牌，让我们惊喜万分。不过现在的我们重新回顾当时比赛的片断时，都觉得自己的表现根本不配得到第三名，也对于当时的成绩难以理解。

中三的时候，我们认定自己在竞赛套路的表现好不到哪里去，若要参加单项和集体，定时什么名次也得不到。大家也就因此放弃了比单项的机会，全心全意投入集体拳。我们基本功的不足，彻彻底底的在我们的集体套路中显现。手中没有任何的器械让人更容易看破我们的不足之处。不过我们非常的努力，非常的投入，相信这样就足够了。当我们问教练我们集体拳的胜算有多高的时候，他们几乎很肯定地告诉我们，我们很有机会拿到名次。比赛名单出炉的时候，我们发现在B组 的集体拳队伍只有五个，包括我们在内。当时我们信心大增，仿佛打了强心针一样。我们还笑说自己不肯能拿不到名次的。上完场，比完赛，我们站在一旁等待梦寐以求的得分。谁知道那分数一出，我们的心片刻跌入谷底。哑口无言的我们根本无法了解事情为何会演变成这样。我们并没有犯下什么明显的错误，而且我们认为自己的表现至少能获得第四名。结果，我们成了第五名。应该说是最后一名吧。我们连眼泪也流不出来，因为我们根本就不认为自己应该得到这样的分数，更不明白评判为何会这样评分。八月份的时候，中四的学姐接班给我们。我也在当时成为了南中武术队的队长。当然，我对此深感骄傲，不过也担心自己无能带领队员创高峰。

中四的时候，我们的辈分已经是最大的了，也没有学姐能够教我们，帮助我们。二月份的春节表演对我们来说意义非凡。它对我们的意义绝对比对其他武术队员的意义还要重大，是其他人所难以想象的。我们虽然是中四，不过从来没有在春节表演上表演过。这对于我们而言不仅是一种遗憾，更是一种耻辱。因此，我们决心为我们唯一一次南中春节表演的表演付出一切，让全校师生看到我们最好的一面，看到我们努力和奋斗的成果。为了确保我们的集体到在礼堂台上表演顺利，我们多次到礼堂去‘试场地’。由于礼堂台上的位不够，我们的套路无法按照原本的形式完成。结果我们为了那一次的表演改了套路的一部分。就因为那空间太小。我们虽然每次都练得身心疲惫，伤痕累累，不过当天南中师生在看武术表演时所给的反应让那一切的一切变得非常值得。那时我们一直都渴望得到的，认可。无论是评判的认可，南中全体师生的认可，教练的认可，学姐的认可，学妹的认可，都是我们一直想得到的。不过得到认可的权力似乎一直都被剥夺。直到那一刻。在礼堂掌声响起的那一刻。这一切才有了变数。

对于2009那令人既困惑又被分的成绩，我们还是难以忘记。这已经是我们最后一个机会，最后一个让自己扬眉吐气的机会，容不得我们错过。学了学姐们的集体刀套路之后，我们呕心沥血的改进它，重新编排，整顿队形（七个人的队型可是难以编排的），加入音乐。最终编排出的套路可说是真的属于我们，是我们呕心沥血的结晶，尤其是那结尾。我敢说我们今年所付出的努力比中二和中三的加起来还要多。几乎每当我们在学校的时候有空档，就会会合，一起讨论集体套路的事，一起练那难以达到的单手翻。中四的前四个月几乎都是在为四月十六号的比赛而准备的。比赛永远充满了未知数，而在四月十六号我们也因此感到非常害怕，兴奋，和担忧。距离比赛的时间一分一秒地过去，我的心跳也越变越快。坐在一旁看对手们一一的上场更是让我的心情难以平复。走上地毯式，我的心更是整个都跳了出来。在完成套路的当儿，我不知道为什么脚那么的不稳，那么的不扎实，好像随时都会跌倒似的。打完整套后，我并不是对自己的表现很满意，不过还是认为我们应该很有机会拿到名次。看到分数时，我并不知道我们到底是第几名。因为那分数看起来足以得到第三名，却看起来有可能是第五名。结果我们得到第四名，分数同另外一队一样。不过由于有两队得到第三名，我们根本就拿不到任何奖牌。当时，我们站在礼堂外，个个不知该说什么好。结果我们一个个开始落泪。那时我也觉得眼睛热辣辣的，眼泪也就这样夺眶而出。为什么？为什么我们那么的努力，不过在正式比赛的时候却无法发挥平时的水平？对于我们而言，那是莫大的遗憾。我也没什么时间整顿自己的心情，就在隔天搭早班飞机到北京去了。

如今已是2010年，六月份了。在南中的日子，在武术队的日子也不多了。所以我更要争取仅剩的时间，南中武术队一分子的时间。我能去多少次训练就去多少次，因为时光匆匆流去，再过不久我也就没这个机会了。与其后悔自己没有好好把握在南中的最后半年的时间，何不趁现在，趁遗憾还没形成之前，做自己该做的事？

been following the world cup like xiao the past week and totally neglected my homework =.=


anyway, batch outing on friday was uh quite epic1 hahaha our selection of songs made it seem as though a group of uncles, a group of aunties, a group of kpop crazy teenage girls, a group of .... and .... 


the point is, the range of songs we sang was so wide that it would be shocking to any normal person who saw it. but nonetheless, we had an awesome time there. especially since kbox gave us 40 mins free and we were all O.O about it.


and the world cup has been full of surprises so far. hahaha and it was awesome when serbia beat germany 1-0 xD since they didnt deserve to lose against ghana. although vidic didnt seem to learn from his teammate who got sent of as a result of a second yellow card for handballing against ghana, letting them win due to the penalty. but serbia's keeper was good enough and podolski was quite terrible in the game and his penalty got saved.